I was looking through some old posts and I found this. In the light of the kind of images I'm creating for stock photography sites these days it takes on a somewhat ironic twist.
Anyway, hope you enjoy it.
Frank Zappa once described Steve Vai as someone who played 'Stunt Guitar'. These days we have 'Stunt Photography'. We've all seen it, lots of wacky angles, no depth of field, close ups of shoelaces, that sort of thing. Its beloved in the forums, in photo magazines and by picture libraries who stick it on the front pages of their websites.
Its supposed to be 'Artistic' 'Creative' 'Modern' 'Cutting edge' etc. etc. But to me it is more like:-
'I've got a f/1 lens and I'm going to use it'
'I took this shot of the cat with a high speed strobe flash, shortly before it walked into the lawn mower'
'This shot of my nose hair taken with a fish-eye lens is a metaphor for the alienation and anomie of modern city life'
'I'm rubbish at anything else so I shot this picture of my fridge with a Lomo'
'I went to this art photography exhibition and all the pictures looked like when I press the shutter by mistake. I used to throw them away but now its obvious I'm a subliminal artist'
'I read this article that sharpness was a bourgeois concept, so I don't bother to focus anymore and my pictures now say so much more'
'I've found this really interesting filter in Photoshop.......'
'Instagrams really cool'
'I took all the pictures for this project on the dustbins in my street with a mobile phone. I've been shortlisted for an arts bursary'
'If you can't tell what my pictures are of, you just don't understand art'
'Its a multi-stitch panorama taken with a 400mm lens 3 feet from the Houses of Parliament. It comprises 360,000 shots and it took 4 years to stitch together'
'I sawed off half of one the legs of my tripod because I just couldn't stand to take those boring shots of buildings anymore where all the verticals are straight'
'That effect was created by supergluing a piece of blutack to the front of the lens'
'I took these shots having removed the lens'
'I find discarded pieces of chewing gum really interesting'
'I decided to take all of these portraits from the back to reveal peoples outer souls'
'I can't really remember how I came to take this picture. Its the inside of my camera bag I think'
'I've found another really interesting filter in Photoshop.....'